Wanna combat an adversary wielding a "Legendary Super-Pickax"? (...as infamously described within this long post, for anyone who might not know what I'm referring to!)
...Or ANY ol' pickax, for that matter?
Just follow the example of the Caped Crusader, as seen in BATMAN #269 (DC Comics, Cover Date: November, 1975)...
...And reach for a "Legendary Super Bat-Sledgehammer"!
If you didn't pack one in your utility belt, and your sidekick's not around to get it from the car, you can always just BORROW one from an obliging assailant!
Okay... Not exactly an authorized "Legendary Super Bat-Sledgehammer" - but, in Batman's hands, almost ANYTHING becomes "Legendary and Super"!
Dig those cah-raaazy sound effects, Man! KRONNGG (...and, strangest of all) TUCK (?)
I guess, by the mid-seventies the old Bat-standards POW!, BAM!, BIFF!, and CRAACK! had become passé. I can kinda "hear" KRONNGG but what, exactly, does TUCK sound like, anyway?
By knocking him out, is Batman TUCKing the bad guy into bed for a long night's sleep?
And, if he were do this repeatedly, for a long period of time, would even Batman get... TUCKered-out?
Ah, I've got it... A limerick!
A sledgehammer blow went TUCK! It...
left its recipient to say, "Oh..".
...I CAN'T DO IT! I JUST CAN'T! SORRY!
Instead, I'll just kinda-sorta gracefully exit, leaving you with this thought...
At least the "Legendary Super Pickax" weaponized against Batman...
...DIDN'T BREAK!
...KRONNGG and TUCK made for BETTER DIALOGUE, too!
Even BATMAN "feels our pain" over this!
12 comments:
I have an interesting story concerning Scrooge’s Legendary Super Pickax”. Believe it or not, I actually have the trade paperback of “My First Millions”. I thought that maybe someone at IDW/Disney would have read all our complaints about the multiple problems with the mini-series and have fixed them for the paperback (like normal publishers do when they catch mistakes in the first printing of something). Nope. The only change made was to replace the previous Uncle Scrooge logo with the 1990s era logo. (It was still early in the run, before we figured out that no one was listening).
A valiant try, Deb… but all for naught.
I think it may have been possible if David Gerstein were still involved… then again, if he were, it would never have been published to read so badly in the first place!
While it’s relatively easy to restore specific wordings and other items altered for the monthly books, this would have involved an entire rewrite, from start to finish, of the dialogue of all four chapters… and I don’t think anyone was gonna go for that!
Besides, if it were given to me to even tweak just the most egregiously unacceptable parts (such as those shown in the linked post), I would have heralded that, urging everyone to give it a look! It all appears to be moot anyway, as it doesn’t look as if those books are being published anymore. …So, perhaps they DID “listen” after all… to the sound of us (the only fan and consumer base these comics ever really had) stop buying them in response to the self-proclaimed “Fresh and Modern” approach!
Let's hope it served as a lesson to the decision-makers (though I doubt it), relegate it to history, and keep discovering new joys in the thousands of back issues that will always be out there!
Yeah, I regard it much the same way I do the Boom DuckTales: Rightful Owners trade paperback (I missed the individual issues): an interesting memento of a not-so-great time in Disney comics history.
That may be the best way to look at it, Deb! Though, unlike Batman’s giant penny, Joker playing card, and animatronic dinosaur, BOTH are mementos I’m pleased to NOT have in my “Trophy Room”!
Of course, despite my moving-on, I still intend to keep the phrase and imagery of “Legendary Super-Pickax” alive indefinitely… because it’s just so much fun!
It may be somewhat closer to Gladstone Gander’s dime he keeps locked in a safe. He doesn’t want to look at it, but he doesn’t get rid of it either.
Ya know what, Deb? I think that may be the PERFECT analogy!
Oh, wait… that dime would actually be of SOME value to others… as opposed to…
It ended up as more than 4 issues...they actually continued the "first millions" concept all the way to "My Eighth Million." Looks like it stopped after that. I know, I know. It's like Gladstone's token of the one moment of weakness when he actually worked for a living. What can I say in my defense, except that I was curious? I wanted to find out how bad it could get. Answer: pretty bad.
And as you said, it's not worthy of "trophy room" status...unless some day there is an award presented for poor comics writing.
So IDW's Disney comics finally folded up their tents? I can't say I'm surprised, given the editorial decisions of recent years. I still am amazed that they kept it going as long as they did. With no comics being sold in drug stores or supermarkets, no comics being sold at Barnes & Noble, no comics being sold in any of the Disney theme parks (which utterly baffles me), and the only live source being local comic book shops which in recent months have largely gone out of business, the only possible way they could have been doing business was either through the dwindling market of specialty shops or online sales. And how many of the target audience would hang out at comic book shops (places frequented mostly by people of approximately our vintage)? Or would order online, which is one thing I find young people rarely do? (And not surprising, because they don't have cash or credit.)
I know and get how comics found their target audience in the 12-cent days. Comics were available. They were sold in supermarkets and drug stores, even sometimes in gas stations. And the in the early days of Disneyland they were even sold in theme parks. So they reached their audience. But in these latter times, to print comics that only would appeal to a smaller segment--skewed older and with more ready cash--and then to disconnect from that segment by ditching quality in favor of (fill in whatever word you want) seems to be almost like deliberate self-sabotage. It's not like these new readers they wanted were interested or even aware. So they alienated their main base and went after a virtually non-existent market.
Oh, well. As you said...there are always back issues. And now the Disney Masters series. Maybe even more good stuff to come from some other source in the future. One can always hope.
Scarecrow:
You write:
“It ended up as more than 4 issues...they actually continued the ‘first millions’ concept all the way to ‘My Eighth Million.’”
EIGHT?! Egad, talk about “too much of a bad thing”!
“I know, I know. It's like Gladstone's token of the one moment of weakness when he actually worked for a living.”
Like Gladstone’s dime, I hope you have them locked away, where no one will ever see them!
“What can I say in my defense, except that I was curious?”
If the road to hell is paved with good intentions, do you know what the road to “curiosity” is paved with? …Dead cats! In this case, ignorance would have truly been bliss!
“And as you said, it's not worthy of "trophy room" status...unless some day there is an award presented for poor comics writing.”
Of course, I’ve been having a little good-natured-but-heartfelt-fun with your comments, but let’s be certain to do the right thing and draw the proper distinction at this point… The ORIGINAL STORY is not an example of “poor comics writing”!
Perhaps it was a little too ambitious in its attempt to mimic Don Rosa’s “Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck” but without the skill of Rosa and the source material of Barks to draw upon – but the two issues that I read, before “I could stands no more!” (Thank you, Popeye!) were in no way “poor comics writing”!
It was not the infamous-to-our-regular-readers “Bird Bothered Hero”, nor was it that sorry muddled mess that Boom! threw together under the “DuckTales” banner in its waning days as a Disney licensed publisher!
To be perfectly clear, it was the TRANSLATION AND DIALOGUE the story was unfortunately saddled with that made it the sad object of ridicule it is today! #LegendarySuperPickax
And, the result of that – and lots more that followed – would seem to be why “IDW's Disney comics finally folded up their tents”, not publishing an issue in about a year, if what I see online is correct!
I wouldn’t know this with any certainty because once our Translation and Dialogue team was cast out of IDW, I divorced myself completely from the situation – AND from the comics themselves – save an occasional Blog post or comment lamenting the situation.
All I can say is that I hope the decision-makers responsible for our casting-out got what they wanted from such a move – because we of the only American audience left for comic books featuring Uncle Scrooge, Donald Duck, and Mickey Mouse sure didn’t! …And enough of us apparently walked-away to show it!
And, if there is another such attempt in the future, I hope the next group of ever-rotating decision-makers take something from this! Yes, as you say… “ One can always hope…”
In Italy, the series went up to twenty installments. "Chapters" wouldn't be the right word for them, as the ones that I've seen translated into English don't seem to be telling a continuous story, but interesting anecdotes in Scrooge's life. If "The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck" is the story of Scrooge's life as if written as a biography, the events in "My First Millions" are stories told by McDuck to entertain his family around the dinner table. If they're a little odd or maybe don't always seem consistent, it can be chalked up to Scrooge trying to keep Grandma, Donald and the boys entertained. Given a better translation/scripting, these comics could be quite entertaining if not necessarily all-time classics. As they are now, they're the broken-down ruins of what could have been.
Well said, Deb!
Even after reading only the first two issues, before quitting in utter disgust, I wished that I had been given a shot at this.
I would certainly have played-up the “tall-tale vibe” that the story strained to present, but could not quite put over, given the blandness of the translation.
Hello, Joe, from the Crew of the Copper-Colored Cupids! Hard to believe it's been two years since we first visited your magnificent comments section, but two years it has been, to the day! In that time, we've had some great adventures, traveled the Multiverse, and even saved it - but your blog is still one of our favorite places to visit! So, from us at the Crew to you - Happy Valentine's Day, and thanks for making such a great place for Copper-Colored Cupids (and all manner of secret societies) to pop up in!
Cupids:
Happy Valentine’s Day to you… and (heck) to ALL you Secret Society guys for making this Blog all the more fun. But, especially to you Cupids, ‘cause this must be… ya know, like your Super Bowl Day!
…Oh, and thanks for that Multiverse saving-thing! It’d be a real drag, if you hadn’t!
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